Jaina Solo (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sticksofthejedi) wrote2013-11-12 11:42 am
sticksofthejedi) wrote2013-11-12 11:42 am
Entry tags:
Memory 78
Memory: Jacen and Corran on balancing being a Jedi and holding a formal job.
Received: Day 298, afternoon
Form: Palm-sized snowflake. Kiss it to receive memory, and feel chilled and numb afterward. Unlimited uses.
Summary: Being a Jedi and being a member of the military means doing things differently. Jaina tries reassuring Jacen before a mission that has him nervy, and they end up getting some different perspectives on things.
--
This is a big talky memory with Jaina and Jacen on the Ralroost toward the beginning of the Vong war. They're in a meditation cabin with a great view of the lightshow that is hyperspace. Jaina's just found him, and they're bantering about how agitated he is. She does know; there's the twin bond, after all. Jacen explains that it's a little daunting because Mom and Dad fought the Empire, and that was tough, but the Yuuzhan Vong is their generation's Empire, and they're bigger and badder. Jaina notes that the Force helped them before and they don't have that against the Vong; they just have to be themselves.
She's got Rogue Squadron to be role models for that. Jacen thinks not having the Force must, for them, be like being colorblind. He's worried about how so many people are willing to put their lives on the line for the upcoming fights. To him, it's strange for people to risk their lives to defend people on worlds they may never see; it's just what Jedi do, but for others. . . Jaina picks at her fingernails and suggests it's just the way he's looking at it. He prompts her to explain that they have to look at things on a less grand scale.
Jaina: You look at the situation, you take responsibility for the things you can handle, and you trust others to shoulder their burden. I'm just one pilot in the squadron. I'm responsible for my wingmate. I'm responsible to Colonel Darklighter. I carry out my orders as best I can. If I try to think beyond that, I'll be distracted and then I won't be of use to anyone.
Jacen: But, Jaina, you're a member of Rogue Squadron. All the tradition - how can you not carry that with you?
Jaina: I don't have time for it, Jacen. I concentrate on what I have to do now, not worrying about the past or what might happen in the future. I'm kind of surprised that all this has hit you so suddenly. Or, rather, that it hasn't hit you before.
She suggests that he's been able to afford to worry about the grand scale because he's smart and talented enough to get the job done without thinking, giving him time to worry about everything else. He denies it, but she points out on Belkadan he freed slaves from the Vong without thinking about it -- instead, he was wrapped up in whether or not the Force had really given him a glimpse of the future. He used to act like being a Jedi is synonymous with hero, but that's not what everyone is here for: they're here to do their jobs. But he's still stuck looking for more in everything. He wonders if she hasn't questioned what she's been taught, if she isn't trying to push herself beyond -- he doesn't know what.
She's just going to have to take each job as it comes, master it, and then look for the next thing. He's lost because he doesn't have a job. Jaina cuffs him upside the head, and suggests being a Jedi is his job, and he has the mission to Garqi to concentrate on. It's the same thing as always: He hasn't even gone on the mission, and he's already worrying about what's beyond Garqi. The Vong aren't like their adventures with the academy. If he keeps looking past them, he won't get past them at all. The mission to Garqi will help him perfect being himself. Corran Horn and Ganner is going along, two very different men he can look at at decide what to do and what to avoid.
Jacen: Now you're going to tell me that you knew all this stuff because girls mature faster than boys.
Jaina: Women, Jacen, women mature faster than boys. Look, neither of us is playing kids' games anymore. We either have to be as sharp as we can, or we end up being very dead. And a lot of other people with us.
He arm drapes, and suggests they get some caf before the mission. He'll be a jedi, she'll be a pilot, but for now they can just be brother and sister. She looks past him and notices Corran's come in. Jacen thinks it's odd he didn't just call. Corran addresses Jaina as a Lieutenant, but Jacen's just Jacen. Corran says he just came by to get some caf before Garqi, and they banter about how maybe they shouldn't go if the caf is bad there. Then he and Jaina banter with formalities about being a Rogue pilot. He's heard good things about her in the squadron; it strays toward how being a Rogue is a different responsibility than being a Jedi. He'd like to fly in a sim against her, and she's embarrassed, saying she still can't compete with the oldest Rogues. Wedge and Tycho still regularly vape her in exercises. He says they still take him out, too, so they should team up against the two.
Jacen: Do you prefer being back in the military to being a Jedi?
Corran: It was nice to see the uniform still fit, and I like the extra pip. Even got rid of my beard. But I'm no less a Jedi in this uniform than you are or Jaina is. It's a convenient fiction to get done what needs to be done. I'd prefer it were otherwise, but if we have to play games to save some lives, I'll play. [...] One thing that is going to be very important - something I know your sister is learning with Rogue Squadron - you're going to have to follow orders. I know that independent action the two of you took at Helska 4 saved Danni Quee. I also know your running off to free slaves on Belkadan didn't end so well. Right now you're going to be part of a team. We all depend upon each other, so no running off on some wild tear just because you think you know what has to happen. I'm never going to say no to something just to say no. If it makes sense, I'll consider it. Understand?
Corran picked Jacen because the boy's got experience with the Vong, and he's shown heart. If things go right, they'll be in and out and hopefully it'll all go without the typical reckless heroics the Solo family tends to get into. It doesn't hurt the operation to have that Corellian disdain for odds and Noghri fighters along. And Ganner -- well, he doesn't know odds from goats, he's good in a fight, and if he just takes the time to think before acting can be smart. Also, he's handsome. Jaina certainly noticed that. They've got a day or two to get ready. Corran tells her to keep helping out Rogue Squadron's rep. Once he's left, Jacen notes that she was awfully formal when she spoke to him.
Jaina: In the military, Jacen, familiarity flows downhill, not up. We're playing by different rules now, I guess.
Jacen: Same goal, different paths. Which could get me thinking beyond the mission at hand, but I won't. First things first. Get through them, and then worry about the future.
Jaina: That, my brother, is a winning strategy.
Received: Day 298, afternoon
Form: Palm-sized snowflake. Kiss it to receive memory, and feel chilled and numb afterward. Unlimited uses.
Summary: Being a Jedi and being a member of the military means doing things differently. Jaina tries reassuring Jacen before a mission that has him nervy, and they end up getting some different perspectives on things.
--
This is a big talky memory with Jaina and Jacen on the Ralroost toward the beginning of the Vong war. They're in a meditation cabin with a great view of the lightshow that is hyperspace. Jaina's just found him, and they're bantering about how agitated he is. She does know; there's the twin bond, after all. Jacen explains that it's a little daunting because Mom and Dad fought the Empire, and that was tough, but the Yuuzhan Vong is their generation's Empire, and they're bigger and badder. Jaina notes that the Force helped them before and they don't have that against the Vong; they just have to be themselves.
She's got Rogue Squadron to be role models for that. Jacen thinks not having the Force must, for them, be like being colorblind. He's worried about how so many people are willing to put their lives on the line for the upcoming fights. To him, it's strange for people to risk their lives to defend people on worlds they may never see; it's just what Jedi do, but for others. . . Jaina picks at her fingernails and suggests it's just the way he's looking at it. He prompts her to explain that they have to look at things on a less grand scale.
Jaina: You look at the situation, you take responsibility for the things you can handle, and you trust others to shoulder their burden. I'm just one pilot in the squadron. I'm responsible for my wingmate. I'm responsible to Colonel Darklighter. I carry out my orders as best I can. If I try to think beyond that, I'll be distracted and then I won't be of use to anyone.
Jacen: But, Jaina, you're a member of Rogue Squadron. All the tradition - how can you not carry that with you?
Jaina: I don't have time for it, Jacen. I concentrate on what I have to do now, not worrying about the past or what might happen in the future. I'm kind of surprised that all this has hit you so suddenly. Or, rather, that it hasn't hit you before.
She suggests that he's been able to afford to worry about the grand scale because he's smart and talented enough to get the job done without thinking, giving him time to worry about everything else. He denies it, but she points out on Belkadan he freed slaves from the Vong without thinking about it -- instead, he was wrapped up in whether or not the Force had really given him a glimpse of the future. He used to act like being a Jedi is synonymous with hero, but that's not what everyone is here for: they're here to do their jobs. But he's still stuck looking for more in everything. He wonders if she hasn't questioned what she's been taught, if she isn't trying to push herself beyond -- he doesn't know what.
She's just going to have to take each job as it comes, master it, and then look for the next thing. He's lost because he doesn't have a job. Jaina cuffs him upside the head, and suggests being a Jedi is his job, and he has the mission to Garqi to concentrate on. It's the same thing as always: He hasn't even gone on the mission, and he's already worrying about what's beyond Garqi. The Vong aren't like their adventures with the academy. If he keeps looking past them, he won't get past them at all. The mission to Garqi will help him perfect being himself. Corran Horn and Ganner is going along, two very different men he can look at at decide what to do and what to avoid.
Jacen: Now you're going to tell me that you knew all this stuff because girls mature faster than boys.
Jaina: Women, Jacen, women mature faster than boys. Look, neither of us is playing kids' games anymore. We either have to be as sharp as we can, or we end up being very dead. And a lot of other people with us.
He arm drapes, and suggests they get some caf before the mission. He'll be a jedi, she'll be a pilot, but for now they can just be brother and sister. She looks past him and notices Corran's come in. Jacen thinks it's odd he didn't just call. Corran addresses Jaina as a Lieutenant, but Jacen's just Jacen. Corran says he just came by to get some caf before Garqi, and they banter about how maybe they shouldn't go if the caf is bad there. Then he and Jaina banter with formalities about being a Rogue pilot. He's heard good things about her in the squadron; it strays toward how being a Rogue is a different responsibility than being a Jedi. He'd like to fly in a sim against her, and she's embarrassed, saying she still can't compete with the oldest Rogues. Wedge and Tycho still regularly vape her in exercises. He says they still take him out, too, so they should team up against the two.
Jacen: Do you prefer being back in the military to being a Jedi?
Corran: It was nice to see the uniform still fit, and I like the extra pip. Even got rid of my beard. But I'm no less a Jedi in this uniform than you are or Jaina is. It's a convenient fiction to get done what needs to be done. I'd prefer it were otherwise, but if we have to play games to save some lives, I'll play. [...] One thing that is going to be very important - something I know your sister is learning with Rogue Squadron - you're going to have to follow orders. I know that independent action the two of you took at Helska 4 saved Danni Quee. I also know your running off to free slaves on Belkadan didn't end so well. Right now you're going to be part of a team. We all depend upon each other, so no running off on some wild tear just because you think you know what has to happen. I'm never going to say no to something just to say no. If it makes sense, I'll consider it. Understand?
Corran picked Jacen because the boy's got experience with the Vong, and he's shown heart. If things go right, they'll be in and out and hopefully it'll all go without the typical reckless heroics the Solo family tends to get into. It doesn't hurt the operation to have that Corellian disdain for odds and Noghri fighters along. And Ganner -- well, he doesn't know odds from goats, he's good in a fight, and if he just takes the time to think before acting can be smart. Also, he's handsome. Jaina certainly noticed that. They've got a day or two to get ready. Corran tells her to keep helping out Rogue Squadron's rep. Once he's left, Jacen notes that she was awfully formal when she spoke to him.
Jaina: In the military, Jacen, familiarity flows downhill, not up. We're playing by different rules now, I guess.
Jacen: Same goal, different paths. Which could get me thinking beyond the mission at hand, but I won't. First things first. Get through them, and then worry about the future.
Jaina: That, my brother, is a winning strategy.